Many people say that absence makes the heart grown fonder, but if what if that absence is long-term? Some people are involved in relationships in which they have been hundreds – or even thousands – of miles apart from their loved one for weeks, months, and even years. How does this impact the relationship? Does it improve? Do things stay the same? Does the relationship slowly deteriorate? If you’re currently involved in a long-distance relationship, then the answer depends on you. A relationship is like anything else. If you want it to be successful, you must work hard at it. And when it’s a long-term relationship, you must work even harder. That said, perhaps ‘work harder’ isn’t the best phrase. Working smarter would be a better way to put it. Working harder might refer to someone being compulsive. In other words, someone who is constantly calling, e-mailing, and/or texting. This might work out at first, but eventually, it will become a nuisance. Worse yet, it could even lead to your significant other losing interest. That’s the last thing you want.
The right way to go about it is to keep in touch, but still give her (or him) space. This will show that you trust her, and that you care. But how do you go about finding this fine line between caring individual and psychopath? Follow the steps below to find out.
While e-mails are nice, they don’t show your personality as much as a card. And they certainly don’t show your thoughts as well as a hand-written letter. By sending a card or writing a letter, you’re showing that you took out time to do something for your loved one. This will always be appreciated. And, yes, that’s even if you talk on the phone regularly. Also remember, the best cards and letters are those that come unexpectedly, not the ones that come on birthdays and holidays. After the initial surprise letter, it’s always good to keep them going about once per week.
Another nice surprise is to visit a scenic area near where you live – botanical gardens, a beach, a waterfall – and take pictures. You can send the pictures by mail or computer and let your loved one know that you were thinking about them the whole time, wishing they were there. You can also make a promise that you will visit that location together in the future.
The ultimate surprise, and one that’s a little more difficult to pull-off, is to make a surprise visit. Prior to doing this, make sure her work or family plans won’t interfere. You can find out this information in a casual conversation without giving away your plans. If the timing is right and she’s available to spend time when you show up, she’ll be ecstatic. Not just because you’re there, but because you put in the time, energy, and money to make it happen. It will show how much you care about her. Perhaps you will have to pay $500 for a round-trip ticket or drive eight hours through the night. Whatever the case may be, it will be greatly appreciated.
One of the most important aspects about being in a long-distance relationship that hasn’t been covered yet is to surround yourself with the right people. If you associate yourself with people who cheat, you’re more likely to cheat. If you associate yourself with good people, the odds of maintaining your relationship will greatly improve. The best case scenario is to find someone else who is going through the same thing. You will be able to support each other.
While all the information above is important, keep in mind that if it’s meant to be, everything will work itself out.