In traditional dating scenarios, fear of public humiliation serves as a powerful tool that tempers our worst ideas. Unfortunately, the nature of online dating diminishes that fear, and it often empowers our bravado in ways that allow our least favorable attributes to manifest themselves. In order to help even the crummiest online dater, we’ve assembled these online dating tips for men, or in other words, here’s a clue as to what women do not want.
• Choose the dating service with care.
Successful online dating starts with an honest assessment of oneself. The next step is to choose the appropriate dating service. The large services try to cater to all types, but perhaps you have niche interests. Being honest with who you are is the quickest route to online dating success.
• Don’t lie.
In that vein, don’t lie. Avoid even the whitest of lies. Those fibs can earn you early successes, but those don’t amount to much. If the point is to find a real relationship, then all you do by lying is undermine that effort. Inevitably, those lies will come back to haunt you.
• Be aware of online dating safety.
Online dating safety is something that women take very seriously, but that men tend to disregard. A lack of knowledge may put you in the position of setting off warning signals inadvertently. Learn what it is that women are wary of, and then use that information to avoid sending the wrong signals.
• Build a productive profile.
Productive online dating begins with a profile that attracts the right kind of women. Take time constructing your profile, and for love of all that is holy, spellcheck it. Spelling errors don’t necessarily mean you’re dumb, but they are an indication that you just don’t give a damn.
• Post great, recent photos.
The photo is what gets them in the door, so to speak, so use it to your advantage. Don’t post generic or outdated photos. Dress for success, and then takes pictures at that moment. It’s not a lie to put your best foot forward, and don’t be afraid to use your profile pic as a creative outlet. It shows personality.
• Communicate effectively online.
Those initial online introductions can make or break you. Until you have familiarity with a person, never communicate without purpose. Remember that your opening volley should consist of an introduction, a compliment, and a series of questions about HER profile. Don’t send a request by telling her more about you.
• Be respectful.
We tease our friends. We’re arrogant. We bust their balls. Men often communicate this way in casual settings. Women DO NOT. That’s not to say some women aren’t attracted to that type of banter. Surely some are. However, early in communication, it’s simply a great way to lose them.
• Humor is your ally.
Humor is a great starting point because the sentiment is universal. That doesn’t mean we all find the same things funny. So keep it light initially, and then up the ante as you become more familiar with her personality. Humor is a great way to flirt online because it provides both people an easy out.
• KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid)
Keeping it simple means not overcomplicating things prior to that first in-person meeting. How would you feel if your newest profile match started talking about marriage and kids? It’s no different from you dumping all your troubles on them or detailing your long-term plans.
• Make that first in-person date a memorable one.
Everything has been going great online, so you finally asked her on that first in-person date, and she agreed. That’s great, but this is a big opportunity, so don’t drop the ball. Of course, you don’t want to go so overboard that you seem like a nut, but you definitely want to show her that you went the extra mile.