There are few opportunities in life that have the potential for romanticism equal to a proposal. The proposal is a man’s – or woman’s – opportunity to confess their love to the person of their dreams in a manner personal to their relationship and history together. Proposals have become the stuff of legends due mainly to their romantic portrayals in Hollywood movies and television shows. Reality can be much different than the big screen, though there are a number of things to keep in mind when planning a romantic proposal. Timing is of the essence, and a little planning goes a long way in preventing the kind of clumsy pitfalls so commonly seen in misguided requests for a hand in marriage.

Be Prepared – Proposing might seem more romantic if it seems spontaneous or adventurous, though preparation is key to make sure the proposal goes off without a hitch. Especially in public venues, research should be done to ensure that the targeted place for proposal is not otherwise engaged for public events or routine maintenance. Parks and dining venues usually have rotating schedules of events and activities that could hinder the romantic aspect of a proposal. For instance, it would not be so romantic to propose at a park the day they set aside for spreading of fertilizer and litter removal. Furthermore, restaurants could become disastrous for a proposal on family night or if the best tables are occupied by a banquet or large party.

Be Imaginative – Though there are some tried and true methods of proposing that retain their romantic allure even after repeated use (see: ring in the champagne glass, sky-writing, Empire State Building and Eiffel Tower), the best way to pull off a romantic proposal is to personalize the event. The history of a relationship can be used to pull out emotions during a proposal that feel sentimental and special. Re-enacting the first date, a special event shared together or simply popping the question during a routine movie-night together are all great ways to propose with intimate sentimentality. Most people who become the object of someone’s affection enjoy reliving the steps they took to get to such a special point in their relationship.

Be Flexible – Despite all the planning and preparation imaginable, sometimes there will be unexpected events that pop up in the way of a proposal. Accidents, illnesses, prior engagements or urgent rescheduling can all hinder the perfect romantic proposal. Generally, the best rule is to go with the flow. If the time is right and the person is right, work around any inconvenience and you may generate a more romantic response. Proposals made in a park in the pouring rain might be a charming romantic alternative to rescheduling in hopes of a perfect-weather day.

Above all the rules and tips for a romantic proposal is to maintain a positive attitude. Proposing should be a joyous moment that two people share together in love. The anxiety and stress associated with preparing an intricate proposal shouldn’t outweigh the fun and happiness the moment implies. This is, after all, a commitment to show someone you’re planning on a lifetime with them. It would be a shame to project a lifetime of anxiety and stress.